Life is so wonderful until you get married.
And this is not just for men, I guess the bad part happens for women more.
Am I supporting feminism? No, I am not.
But if men work out all day, women handle the indoor stuff as well. If men are sitting in an air-conditioned office, yelling over the phones or getting to hear the yelling (you know from your boss), women are standing in front of that damn stove, cooking your favorite dish.
Both the parties’ work the best and that is what makes a marriage successful.
But women face those freaky and really stupid questions.
They need to somehow manage to control their rolling eyes and smile at the dumb questions and pretend like they never did hear them.
My aunt used to do that, no not eye rolling.
She used to pretend like she never heard someone ask her; “Ma, when are you going to have your second child,”
“Haven’t you planned a second child yet?”
I loved the way she indulged herself in something else and leaving the next person totally embarrassed.
The last time I checked, marriage and having children is such a private matter, isn’t it?
Just because a woman is ringed, her life is not a matter of discussion and that doesn’t signal for; “HER LIFE COMPLETELY CHANGED.”
We live in the 21st-century guys. I see women these days being totally what they were before marriage after they have been tied the knot as well.
And I guess, whenever I get married, I will appreciate if my wifey sticks to what she used to when I fell for her.
All those creepy aunts at those totally “good for nothing” kitty parties should know that they are not allowed to bring their nose in everyone’s business.
And they are so not allowed to ask these insane questions as well.
1. How is your Married Life Going?
Anyways a guy who is married for 25 years would answer this question by showing you this!
But same can’t be said about women.
And by the way, this is asked so many times too.
And I guess this one is equally irritating for newly wedded guys as well. My friend got married and he returned to work like 10 days later. And when she was asked this question and he said GREAT. But you know what? You will hear this from every woman ever.
But you know what? You will hear this from every woman ever.
And the answer is; same, just the same as it was going last weekend when we met at a dinner and you asked me this super lame question even then.
IT IS STILL GOING SAME.
2. Where are the Kids? When are you Guys Having Kids?
I mean the poor lady is just left to it and guys just sit there, passing that smirk to them.
Yes, I can see all the ladies rolling their eyes on this. No one should ask this. And you are totally not supposed to ask this after a month of someone’s wedding…and not even six months later.
Like the two idiots just met each other and maybe they are trying to enjoy their life? They can definitely chill it out before they introduce another idiot in their life. I mean, give them a break and focus on your own kids…can you?
3. Most of all Things Married Women Hate Have you Guys done Family Planning?
And even if they did it is called family planning dude and you aren’t family or are you?
So obviously, the lady does not need to share it with you.
And what do you know about the couple whose child you are so eagerly waiting for? I mean, maybe they want to adopt someone or they don’t want kids at all?
I guess this question (including the 2nd one) should be banned to ask from married women and couples in all. It is without a doubt, a very private matter.
4. And then they say; “You will Have Kids when it is Time.”
Did anyone ask you that? Waving the stupid darn hand in front of their faces!
And rolling eyes are a must!
What if they aren’t even trying? But anyway, should they thank you for the hope-filled statement that was totally not needed in the first place?
5. So when is the Next Baby Coming?
The woman is lying there in the room, trying to get a second glance of her newborn and one of those creepy aunts’ starts: “when is the next baby coming in?”
I guess you should just near your face to the woman who just went through the entire process so she can just SLAP YOU?!
I mean, cant the poor girl and obviously, her poor uterus gets some rest?
Or do you guys want her babies in future soccer team (that makes you so eager?)!
6. Take out Sometimes for Yourself:
The last time I said that to my mom, she gave me this look
“OKAY! You can do the damn dishes today!”
And I laughed first and then I was like…OOKAAAY, SHE IS DAMN SERIOUS… backed off slowly….
When do you suggest someone to take out time for them and to take care and all that shit…do you realize how much burden they are carrying on their damn shoulders?
Maybe you don’t! And if you are suggesting them that, why don’t you babysit their cute little baby boy for a day or two or maybe just a week? I didn’t see you quite willing for that so maybe you can keep that filthy opinion to yourself.
7. Don’t Feel Sad…You will Get a Boy Next Time:
Oh, really Please tell me more!! I am all ear
I mean, what is wrong with having a girl? And that is what the sweet mother does say.
“I am totally fine with a girl as well. It is mine that is what matters to me.”
This statement in itself is so annoying and yes for a woman who just gave birth to someone…don’t make her feel like she did the wrong thing!
Praise the child, and tell her how pretty she is sainted of making her cry over the fact that she didn’t have a penis instead of a vagina.
Get over it people…we are the revolutionized and new generation, dump that discrimination, can you?? This thing is mostly in India!
I mean if a girl is born… aa leave it, let’s get to the next question!
8. They are so CLOSE to AGE
The last time I checked, whoever has sex in life, can get pregnant? I mean that is what science tells us right?
But I guess people don’t get this fact straight maybe they need to have sex more to try if they do get pregnant or not (yeah I know, until you are taking some precautionary measures).
And yeah, the couple can have the physical thingy whenever they want to and give a child to the zillion of babies; it’s totally not your business.
I wonder how ladies handle this shit though. Have you people ever thought of it? Maybe now you will!
9. Did you come Alone? Where is your Husband?
A married woman is a grown up
I guess? And she can attend events or weddings or simply anything on her very own. Or she can’t?
I guess the poor lady just forgot to handcuff herself with her better half and she also lost the keys. So maybe she needs to tell you that”
“HEY GUYS. I AM LOST. FIND ME A NEW HUSBAND HERE SO I CAN ATTEND THE PARTY.”
10. You have Changed; You are Different:
So a round of applause for all the people who tell the married woman that!
Didn’t you tell her to take care of your filthy apartment when you ringed her?
Didn’t you tell her to do the grocery?
Or didn’t you tell her to manage the bills?
I mean, leave her open as she was before you married the poor thing and told her to do all that you wanted. She will be the same that you wanted her to be.
Or maybe you are taking it as; she is finally ringed by me and now she is showing her real colors. I mean, that was such an amazing negative thought of yours.
I just wanted to ask how did you manage to pull that cheap thought in that tiny brain of yours, which hardly works right on major times?! And I know you will now need time to figure this one out as well.
Married life can be such a drag and a total miss as well. But it is better than having sex with 100 girls or those hot bartenders every other weekend.
So you finally give in to one and decide to be totally hot for them.
So yeah, married life is not a drag but people trying to pole their nose into it, does make it a bit annoying and then you wish you had never done this thing in your life.
But the fact is that marriage is no magic. It is not about stolen kisses and hugs. And it is so not about waiting to meet your beloved one.
It is all about making it work. And you never know how hard a couple might be working to make their marriage sustain the charm, love, and magic in it.
So don’t poke them with your “good for nothing” questions and let them leave their lives in peace. Marriage is more like a daily homework and it is heaps of it…so let the woman do her work and the man as well.
They will have a baby, their own house and will settle down whenever they want to. You really don’t need a notification for that.