Undoubtedly, undying love, a mutual love for things, and compatibility are the three horsemen of a healthy and happy relationship. However, one aspect that we often ignore mentioning because we believe it to be customary, is respect.
If someone had to ask us what the driving force of a loving relationship is, we wouldn’t take a second to reply and say respect. If love and compatibility are the pillars of a relationship, then respect is the foundation, the part whose strength and stability determine how well the building stands afoot.
Receiving respect in a relationship helps one to feel safe, valued, protected, and special as well. And if for some reason, your partner loses respect for you in your relationship, then a smooth sailing relationship can turn into a rocky road. Like a crumpled paper can never look smooth again, respect, once lost, cannot be redeemed.
There are various signs to note when a partner stops respecting you like normal in your relationship, and if you have found yourself in a similar situation with your girlfriend, then this article is going to help you.
Your boundaries have become invisible to her
Boundaries are crucial in a relationship. Whether you both are married or dating, or it is about a social relationship, setting boundaries can make your relationship bloom and blossom like nothing else.
They help to give you a breather when you feel like your relationship is taking over, so if your partner stops to value your boundaries, and completely ignores them, then it is certainly a big sign of disrespect.
When all this happens, the relationship can feel strained and you may start to feel trapped.
If your girlfriend cannot take no for an answer, or is being way too nosy in your matters when you have particularly asked for some privacy, then it is clear that she has stopped respecting your boundaries, in turn meaning that she has stopped respecting you as well since she’s threatening your autonomy in the relationship.
She uses your insecurities against you
Opening up about your insecurities, deepest thoughts, and weaknesses are quintessential in building the bond between you and your partner. It is what cultivates intimacy between you two, but if your partner starts to use them against you, such as in an argument or any other situation, then you, my friend, are in danger.
This is a major sign of disrespect and you shouldn’t, under any terms, be okay with it.
Of course, there is room for forgiveness if your partner slips once or twice, for example, under anger or the heat of the moment, but if they keep on repeating their actions, then you need to reconsider the course of your relationship.
No relationship is more important than your self-esteem and feelings, so make the right decision, even if it means that you have to end things.
She cannot stop lying to you
There is no need to say how catastrophic dishonesty is for any relationship out there. Lying usually starts with a one-time thing, however, it can easily build up into a habit to the point where your partner feels the need to lie to you about every little thing.
Dishonesty without a doubt leaves a deep scar on your relationship, and if you sense that your girlfriend is lying to you, then you certainly have to bring the discussion to the table.
Some people may believe that their partner can be forgiven, while some don’t. It entirely depends on your particular situation.
However, at its root, dishonesty deeply damages a relationship, and when you believe that the damage cannot be undone, then you may have to consider breaking things off with her.
She doesn’t respect your privacy
Even though a relationship is the name of happiness in togetherness, the two people in the relationship never stop being individuals of their own who have their distinct personalities.
Both of you have the right to privacy when it comes to things that you just don’t want to share with the other person, be it personal interests, problems, family matters, etc.
Hence, if your partner doesn’t like the idea of you having a life away from them and wishes to snoop around in every little thing that you do, without having the sense of respect that you might want the opposite, then you need to talk about it with them and redefine your boundaries.
It is likely to work, but if the problem prevails, then you may have to call it off as well.
She speaks over you in conversations
We don’t need to tell you how disrespected one feels when they’re conversing with someone and the other person keeps interrupting them or cutting them off.
It’s majorly disrespectful when a random person does this, so just imagine how hurtful it can get when your own partner begins to do so.
Not letting you voice your thoughts or opinions and constantly trying to impose hers on you is a big sign that your girlfriend is disrespecting you.
It’s not just extremely rude but also gives the sign that she is considering her opinions and herself to be superior to you in some way and that is never good in a relationship.
The solution to this problem is bringing your concern to the table and talking it out with your girlfriend. If she claims that she didn’t have any intentions of hurting you and whatever she did wasn’t purposeful, then your problem is solved.
But if the issue prevails and she doesn’t pay heed to your concerns, she’s disrespecting you even more, and you may need to reconsider the path of your relationship.
Her sexual attention is channeling towards someone else
When you have been dating someone for quite some time, you may begin to lose the attraction you once felt towards them. Similarly, it is also entirely possible that you have stopped to enjoy what happens in the bedroom, or perhaps it gets boring.
Whatever the case may be, it can be happening with your girlfriend too.
Perhaps she is bored of your sex life or has stopped feeling those sparks when she looks at you which has led her to feel frustrated and irritated, hence disrespecting you sometimes.
It does happen under frustration that you are unable to focus on the real problem, which is monotony here, and instead focus on something that seems like the problem, but in fact, is not.
So if you feel like your girlfriend doesn’t respect you like she used to do before, you should perhaps talk to her and try to up your game in the bedroom to get that smile on her face and her respect back.
She gets way too heated during arguments
It is said that the true identity of a person is how they act when they are under the effects of anger. Taunts, verbal abuse, etc if acted upon during an argument, are all signs of the person being disrespectful towards you.
Disrespecting each other when you’re fighting is a major setback for a healthy relationship, and the damage it can do goes skin deep and is often irreversible. Indeed, disrespectful arguing in a relationship can even lead towards its end.
If you feel like your girlfriend has suddenly started to disrespect you in your relationship and that’s unlike her, maybe there’s something deeper that’s bothering her and perhaps you can try to talk her through it.
But if the problem is persistent and she regularly does this, then you may want to reconsider the course of your relationship because if a person doesn’t tolerate their anger in front of your love, then they don’t truly respect you.
She doesn’t tend well to you when you visit her
If you both don’t live together and you visit each other often to spend some quality time together, then it’s really important that whatever time you spend together is top-notch and fulfilling.
However, if you feel like your girlfriend doesn’t properly tend to you when you visit her at her place, is busy elsewhere, and doesn’t sit down with you to spend time, then it truly is a sign of disrespect.
You can talk to her about it if it’s bothering you and surely, she will understand.
Her eyes are always on her phone
It’s often said that when you are in love, everything else in life becomes blurry. When you are with the person that you are in love with, nothing else in the world seems more important than them.
If you are on a date and you feel neglected because your girlfriend is paying more attention to her phone screen than you, then it is natural to feel a little disrespected.
Nobody likes it when you are talking to them or want their full attention and they are not paying any heed to you, and especially when your partner does it, it is especially hurtful and disappointing.
Letting her know that her actions are making you feel like you are being unvalued or disrespected will help in improving the situation.
Maybe her actions are unintentional, but if it is hurting you then there is no need to keep on bearing it. Just clear it out with her so you can be stress-free.
So what can you do to maker her respect you?
Talk it out
The best thing to do when you stumble upon a pothole in your relationship is to communicate with your partner about it.
Talking to each other regarding what has been bothering you or giving rise to fights is the absolute best way to keep things stable in the relationship.
If the both of you mutually understand the problem at hand and approach it as a couple, then you are going to steer clear of mishaps and fights.
Similarly, if you feel like your girlfriend doesn’t respect you, then you should try to talk it out with her.
Most of the time, it will result in a solution, otherwise, it will at least make you understand what is going on in her head and help you decide what direction you want to take your relationship in.
Give respect, get respect
As much as you wish to be respected by your partner in your relationship, it is also crucial that you give the same, if not greater amount of respect to them.
If your girlfriend isn’t respecting you, it could be because you have slipped and have not been giving her the respect that she deserves, which in turn has made her act weird towards you.
Maybe you have done something to hurt her feelings and haven’t realized it yet, or maybe she doesn’t like something that you do and isn’t able to properly tell.
Help her out if she is struggling
Sometimes when we are frustrated or irritated at something, we tend to get disrespectful.
If your girlfriend is disrespecting you, it could might as well be due to something personal that she is struggling with.
We only throw our anger on people whom we have control over, so her disrespecting you could just be her bottled-up frustration making her feel bad.
You should ask her if something has been bothering her and support her if she’s going through something by putting yourself secondary.
If you make her understand that you aren’t the enemy and, will be her number one support, then she’ll back away from punishing you for something you haven’t even done.
Couples Therapy
As said before, disrespect can severely damage a happy relationship, and sometimes the damage done feels too much to undo. In such a case, one option is to opt for therapy.
You and your girlfriend can attend couples therapy to rekindle the sense of trust, love, and affection in your relationship so things can get back to normal again.
Sometimes getting help from a third person can do wonders for a couple who finds it hard to solve their problems themselves.
Breakup with her
This might come off as too direct, but it’s only applicable to situations where you feel like you’re facing a dead-end. If nothing else works, and your girlfriend continues disrespecting you, then breaking your relationship is not an extreme move.
If she doesn’t withdraw from her actions and keeps her demeanor, then you are not obliged to keep your relationship working as well.
Respect is a fundamental aspect of a relationship, and without it, few succeed, so instead of elongating your suffering, do what you have to.
However, one thing you need to make sure of before you take this step is to totally assure that nothing else can be done.
You don’t want to make a haphazard decision and later regret it. Think about it as much as you want, sleep on it and then decide.
Conclusion
There are various reasons why your girlfriend doesn’t respect you and even more ways to make her do so.
All you need to do is just identify the problem and come up with a relative and suitable conclusion to it so that you can reverse the situation without causing any further damage.
In some cases, when things are getting out of hand, you may even have to break off your relationship, and honestly, if that’s what you have to do in order to get the respect that you deserve, then let it be the case.
