Men are usually known for putting their foot in their mouths and make their girls upset by the insensitive comments.
We often see women complaining about some offensive statement their man passed and that poor guy doesn’t even have any notion about where did he go wrong.
Actually, same is the case with women as well. Little do women know, that they say things too which can infuriate men.
With good communication, you can build a healthy relationship but communicating your views in a wrong way can destroy what you built.
It is necessary that you should be open and sincere with your man but there is a limit to which you can open up in front of him. Men tend to have unpredictable ego and anger issues and even an inoffensive statement about something can aggravate them or hurt their ego leading to disturbance of your peaceful relationship.
Therefore, you should be cautious about confessing a couple of matters or passing a few statements in front of your boyfriend or your husband. Here is a list of things you should never tell a man if you are looking for your relationship to last longer.
You are better than my ex
Nobody likes to be compared with someone else especially when the one you are comparing him with, happens to be someone you dated. It is hard for a man to get over comparison.
If you keep mentioning your ex, instead of spending quality time with you, he will keep wondering all the time if you are still keeping a score.
Comparison will make him feel like it is some sort of competition for him where he needs to prove that he is better than the man you broke up with. He would not accept it as a challenge but would rather find it annoying and an uncomfortable position to be in.
Even if you are hating on your ex in front of your man, it will still make him think you are not over the guy you left and this can easily irritate him spoiling his mood.
So, if you want to be at good terms with your man and wish to keep him, do not mention the guy who is no longer in your life. Appreciate your man for what good he does for you and don’t take him to your past.
My girlfriends are hot
It is never bad to appreciate the look-good figure of your girlfriends, but confessing it in front of your man that you admire her hot legs and wide waist, you are leading way to open the floodgates of imagination for him.
Mentioning it in front of your man that you believe one of your close girlfriends is really good looking or you wonder that she would be great in bed, you are practically giving him an opportunity to start imagining her in bed and be intimate with her.
Your friend can be the sexiest of all and you have all the rights to adore her body and looks but unless you want to find your man cheat on you with one of your closest friends, you should keep abstain from bringing up the topic of hotness of your friend in front of him.
Appreciate her when you are among your friends but never when you are with your man.
Can you even do the simplest task?
Every man possesses his own set of abilities and questioning him about something he cannot do, can prick his ego.
Asking him if he can perform a task as simple as changing a car tire will make him feel you consider him having less of manly abilities. Even if he doesn’t know it, he will always refuse to admit his ignorance.
Your man would not like to look like a total lug nut in front you and your continuous questioning about the things he doesn’t know how to do will make him feel insecure about himself. It will ultimately lead him to think either you underestimate him or you do not feel him fit for even simplest tasks.
This can give way to heated arguments and misunderstandings.
So it would be better if you can lend him a helping hand rather than make him question his masculinity.
I hate my body
Not feeling comfortable in their own skins, is a problem with majority of the women. One mistake ladies often do, is that they keep pointing out the flaws they feel they have in their body in front of their man.
When you constantly keep showing the flawed aspects of your body to your man, you do yourself two harms:
- You stuff your head with toxic feelings of self-doubt
- You draw your man’s attention to your physical shortcomings
You can bring it up in a subtle way to your man but don’t let him think that you are not confident about your body. Flaunt your imperfections rather than making yourself feel insecure in front of your boyfriend.
That is why your physical flaws are something you should not keep telling your man about.
His BFF is hot
If you are dating a guy, commenting on his friends is something you will need to avoid. No man will be glad to hear his girl admiring his best friend.
Your cheesy comments about his best friend can make him think you find his friend more attractive and you are still checking out other men to look for a better option.
He considers himself the only one for you. If you chose to be with this guy, you shouldn’t care if his friends look as dapper as Tom Cruise.
Even if it is someone else who told you about the hotness of his friend, you don’t want to deliver the message in front of your boyfriend. It can put him in an awkward situation.
Your admiration for his friend can lead him to self-doubt believing he might not be enough for you.
Your light-hearted compliment can take a toll on your relationship so next time you find your man’s friend to be super-hot, you may express it in front of your girlfriends but avoid telling this to your man.
I have groomed you well
Remember that your man has an individual personality of his own. He can have his own preferences, likes and dislikes. You trying to control him and dominating his choices can make him feel suffocated in this relationship.
Your boyfriend would like to keep his individuality while being with you. Your comment that you have trained him well or you have added more to his personality by grooming him can be a blow to his self-esteem.
He might start questioning himself if you like him for the way he was or if you are controlling him to walk on your terms.
In case you don’t want to make your man think that you are manipulative or controlling don’t tell him that you turned him into what he is.
Men don’t like to be controlled. The prefer having their own personal space in relationship. You, as his woman should respect that and should avoid saying stuff that makes him lose his peculiarity.
Be a man!
He doesn’t need to be a man. He already is one. You might say this to buckle him up and build his confidence, but it can totally turn out the other way round.
Telling a man to act like a man is like you are questioning his masculinity. Obviously, no man would like to like hear comments like “man up” or “be a man.”
During his weak moments, he needs you to give him support. He seeks comfort in your arms and expects you to give him courage so, you need to be selective about your words in those times.
Encourage him by telling him that he can do it. Let him know that he has your support. Help him regain his confidence by your caring gestures. In his weak time, last thing he would want to hear from you is to be a man.
This can even lead to misunderstandings thus damaging your relationship so you must know the words you should not tell your man.
Why can’t you be more like my friend’s boyfriend?
Nobody can be perfect. Guys are going to have flaws and make mistakes in a relationship. This can happen frequently.
But in such situations worst thing you can do to damage your relationship is, start comparing it with your friend’s or some other person’s relationship.
You might see the only good aspects of your friend’s boyfriend which makes you feel they are perfect and your man is not doing enough.
If you have a heart-to-heart with your friend, you might come to know that things are not as ideal as they seem.
In this scenario you telling your boyfriend to act like someone else’s can infuriate him. Men don’t like it when they are told how good other men are as compared to them.
If you wish your man to bring you flowers every day or leave you sweet loving notes while leaving for work, ask him right away.
The best way to let your man know of his flaws is to communicate with him instead of telling him that other man is better than him.
Your mom drives me nuts
You can compare the relationship a man and woman have with the love and bond shared by a mother and her son.
Whether you are into two weeks of your relationship or it has been two years, asking your man to choose between you and his mother or making any negative comments about his mother is always a big NO.
Some men think of their mothers as their ideals and telling them that their mother is not likeable is something mean to say to a man.
It is not that their mothers would be all naïve. She can turn out to be a nag and overbearing but she is still his mother. You asking him to make a choice can put your man in an awkward position and it can be stressful for him.
You can just avoid meeting his mom and let the two spend free time rather than passing negative statements about his mother in front of your guy.
I’ve been proposed already
If you have any desire or you plan on marrying your current boyfriend, don’t bring up any official or unofficial proposals you have had in the past.
You might consider it will make you more desirable and will show your boyfriend how many men wanted to have you but there is a possibility doing so will make your man think he is not the first guy to put a ring on your finger.
The event will not remain as special to your man as he imagined it to be and you might even lose the chance of having another engagement ring.
Keep in mind the proposals you had in your past are of the things you should not tell your man unless he insists on knowing so.
That other guy who is really good in bed
Women talk more openly about intimacy and sex. If there is someone in your list of “guys who do it better” try not to mention them in front of your man.
It can create an awkward feeling for you both and can make your man think he might not be giving you the pleasure you desire.
You should not make him feel like he has to break records from your previous experiences in bed, putting him in a state of competition. If you are with him, he is doing it great.
If you need something more you should ask him rather than letting him know the stories from your past when you had it really good.
Summing up…
Even the most progressive and open-minded men still hold their masculinity in high esteem. It would be better if you avoid hitting their egos.
Communication is the basic key to having a healthy relationship but you need to be careful about the selection of words you use to communicate with your man.
Avoid saying stuff to infuriate him. Communicate in a gentle appropriate manner and once you have cleared it all, it would not be a bad idea to enjoy a romantic date night.