Whether you’ve become a fan of Korean men that star in K-pop and Korean dramas or you’re visiting Korea and you met a guy that you like, you’re probably wondering what you can do to make sure that he likes you as much as you like him.
The Korean dating scene is very different from the west and if you’re a westerner there is a lot that you need to know before approaching a Korean guy.
Learn a bit about the Korean culture
If you want a Korean guy to fall in love with you, it is likely that you have some interest in Korean culture. If not, you need to start learning about it.
So if you are already familiar with some Korean phrases and you know about the culture you are on the right track.
You don’t have to be an expert in the Korean culture and traditions, all you need to do is show some interest and curiosity to learn about the culture.
Crash course on Korean Culture:
- Korea being very high in literacy rate has a language similar to Japanese. (Around 75 Million people around the world speak Korean).
- They are very deeply rooted in their traditions. You can read about Chaemyoun (Concept of Face), but you just need to know that when it comes to a healthy relationship, respect is the most important aspect.
- Their cuisine is rich in tastes. Their meal is mostly based on rice and meat.
- They mostly practice Buddhism and Martial arts is deeply rooted in their culture.
So overall, just show respect. Prohibit any kind of physical contact until you are really familiar with them. (That means not even a playful touch, pad, or slap.)
Make the first move and ask them out
The dating culture in Korea is quite different than what you are probably used to. In the west, most of the time, the guy would approach their potential date, strike up a conversation and ask them out.
However, in Korea, most men are very shy and don’t approach strangers. This doesn’t mean that they are not interested, it’s just that they aren’t big on asking strangers out on a date if they like them.
There is nothing wrong with approaching a guy and asking them out, in fact, Korean guys like that very much.
So feel free to make the first move and ask a guy out. Just walk up to them, say hi, and see what happens.
There is no need to be shy or nervous because Korean guys are mostly very warm and welcoming.
Don’t try to be Korean
Korean guys will appreciate the fact that you show a little bit of interest in their culture, however, don’t go too overboard and try to become a Korean girl.
Many foreigners experience Korean culture from K-pop, dramas, and movies and many of them try to adopt what they see there.
This might be an expression of how much they like the Korean culture however it can get a bit too much at times for example trying to say OPPA or doing AEGYO like Korean girls is not a great idea.
Most Korean guys are tired of seeing these things, they want to see something fresh, and if you’re trying to be someone else you’re really going to have a hard time connecting with someone.
Korean guys expect you to be yourself, so the best way is to try and be yourself while having an appreciation and curiosity for the Korean culture.
K-pop isn’t everything
There are many K-pop fans all over the world but K-pop is not everything.
It is a big part of the Korean culture but it’s not the only part. People ask Korean people about k-pop all the time.
They get questions like, do you like BTS? Are you EXO? what’s your bias?
Most Korean guys have heard these questions so many times that even if they are fans of K-pop they don’t like talking about it because after a certain point it just gets old and boring.
So if you want your guy to find the conversation as interesting as you, don’t start with K-pop, in fact, don’t talk about K-pop at all.
Play hard to get and maintain a bit of mystery
Korean guys are guys first Korean second, and like all guys, they want a woman who challenges them.
If you agree with everything that your man says they will see that you’re just being extra nice to get on their good side.
Playing hard to get is a move that works on most of the guys. Make them work for your attention.
He needs to understand that if he wants you in his life he will have to move on your clock.
You don’t want him to think that he has you wrapped around his fingers because that is not going to be good for either one of you.
If he sees that you’re not a challenge he will take that as a red flag and move on without thinking twice.
Understand and respect the cultural differences
Even though South Korea has been influenced quite heavily by western culture, there are still a lot of Korean guys who are going to be conservative.
So if your man is a bit conservative you need to be respectful of the cultural differences.
You’re going to find that their views, thoughts, and ideas are going to differ from yours quite a bit, because of being brought up in totally different cultures.
All you need to do is acknowledge the difference and try to see their perspective and share yours, without jumping to conclusions.
Rather than being rigid about your ideas try to explore what they think and why they think that way.
That will make it all the more fun for both of you and keep the relationship interesting.
The no texting for three days rule doesn’t work with Korean guys
In the west, there’s this idea that texting a romantic interest too soon makes you look clingy and desperate, however, it is the opposite in Korea.
In Korea, most guys want to talk to their significant other on the phone all the time.
No amount of texting is too much, if anything you won’t be able to keep up with the texting.
So feel free to send a text to the guy that you’re into any time of the day without thinking twice and get ready to be glued to your phone, because Korean guys expect their significant others to stay connected constantly through text messaging.
Dress well and smell good
Although your personality is very important when it comes to making a Korean guy fall in love with you, appearance also plays a very important role.
Make sure that you look and smell good even when you’re not going out on a date.
This doesn’t mean that you should look like you’re going to a wedding, in fact, the best thing is that you look comfortable but at the same time pretty and well-groomed. You can do that simply by applying a little making or using a blouse instead of a shirt that you would wear any other day.
Many women make the mistake of thinking that provocative clothing is what impresses a man whereas for men it is much more attractive when they have to use their imagination, therefore showing too much skin usually causes a negative effect when trying to impress a man.
You need to make sure that you don’t lose your own style.
Show yourself as you are rather than conforming to someone else’s style.
Don’t be quick to pick up the bill
One of the most awkward parts of the first few dates is the bill, you don’t know whether you should go for the bill or not.
If he pays for dinner, do you pay for the drink or pay for the next date?
When it comes to Korean guys there are two schools of thought, the traditional approach is that the man should always pay for dinner.
If you’re dating a guy like this you never have to worry about getting the check.
Another approach that is becoming more prevalent in the Korean dating culture is splitting the bill for dinner. Some guys would pay for dinner and let their date pay for coffee or drinks, or pay for the whole date and their date would pay for the next one.
It might be difficult to figure which school of thought your date subscribes to, however offering to get the check will help clarify things, always offer to pay on the first date and you will know exactly what your man expects from you.
At the end of the day a Korean man is a man first and a Korean second, which means apart from a few cultural differences, a Korean man is pretty much the same as any other man.
So, there isn’t too much that you have to do differently, just stick to your natural charm and be yourself.
Many women make the mistake of going overboard with trying to be Korean which can result in overshadowing their own personality.
You don’t have to hide the fact that you’re a foreigner and don’t know everything about the Korean culture, no one expects you to know everything.
You just need to show interest and respect for Korean culture, you will learn the rest along the ride.