It is hard to tell whether a family member really cares for you or is just pretending to care to hide how they actually feel about you. Often family members grow apart because there is a lack of communication. They keep pretending as if things are normal while giving off different signs and signals indicating how they actually feel about you.
This can turn into destructive and toxic cycles, which may be detrimental to your physiological health. However, sometimes it can also be the case that you might be reading too much into things. So the question is, what are the signs that a family member doesn’t like you?
If a family member doesn’t like you, they will try every possible thing to avoid spending time with you and when they do spend time, they will be cold towards you and cut the conversations short. Moreover, they will never appreciate your accomplishments and will find a way to criticize you no matter what you do. no matter how nice you try to be to them, whenever they speak to you, they will make you feel about yourself and what you’re doing.
Why Mostly Family Members Don’t Like You?
- They don’t like spending time with you
A clear sign that a family member does not like you is when they do not spend time with you. This could be done clearly by avoiding you and just leaving the room when you are around. When someone likes you, no matter how busy they are, they find time to spend with you. On the other hand, if someone doesn’t like you, they will find a million different excuses to avoid hanging out with you.
- Conversations with them are usually short
A person who likes you will care about keeping you up to date on their life and also hearing about your life. This is the bare minimum that someone who cares for you does. If a family member cuts conversations with you short, it is a sign that they do not really like you.
If they avoid talking to you about anything important, chances are they do not want you in their life or hate having a conversation with you. Conversations define relationships clearly and how they speak to you says a lot about how they feel about you.
- They avoid eye contact with you
If someone is having a hard time maintaining eye contact with you, it is a clear sign that something is wrong. They are either extremely socially awkward or they don’t like you. The way to tell the difference is to notice how that person acts around other people.
If you feel like they act weird only around you, you can safely deduce that they don’t like you at all. failure to maintain eye contact can mean that they are trying to avoid confrontation or they are giving you a subtle single to end the conversation.
- They never appreciate your accomplishments
A vital part of being a good family member is supporting other members of the family and be their biggest fan. Your family should appreciate your accomplishments and be there to celebrate with you.
If a family member is never appreciative of you or anything that you accomplish, there is definitely an underlying reason. It may be dislike caused by jealousy or dislike for other reasons which keep them from being happy for you.
They may try to undermine our accomplishments and try to disregard them completely. You will probably never hear them say “job well done!”
- There don’t respect your boundaries
It is natural to require boundaries in relationships. Especially when you are living with someone, you need your boundaries and your privacy. If a family member is always crossing these boundaries, the possible cause is that they are hiding a dislike for you.
If you have some rules, values, and beliefs of your own, they will not respect them. They will deceive you, then lie to you, and feel good about it. Even if what they are doing does not seem apparent right away, you will find that their actions greatly impact your mental health.
- They are inconsiderate of your feelings
In order to exist peacefully as a family, it is important for everyone to be considerate of each other’s feelings. One should know what it is that makes another person upset and should avoid doing it. Saying things that are hurtful without any remorse should be out of the question.
If a family member is not careful about these things, it is an indicator that they do not really like you. If they constantly do things without any regard to how it would make you feel, it is not okay.
- They are impossible to please
A sign of a family member who does not like you is that you can never keep them happy. No matter what you do, they always find some way to be unhappy with you. You could be trying your very best to be the best version of yourself, to be on your best behavior, and to be good to them, but it is never enough for them.
They will not appreciate your efforts, will disregard them, and you’ll find yourself stuck in a perpetual loop of trying to please them at the cost of your own well-being. You not being able to please them has nothing to do with you and everything to do with their dislike for you.
- They criticize you
A clear indicator that a family member does not like you is constant criticism. No matter how great you are doing, they will always fixate on somewhere you went wrong. They will constantly nitpick and find traits in your personality that are not a representation of your best self.
They will not care for your accomplishments and will constantly bring up your failures. They will see the smallest of reasons as a chance to degrade you.
You will find them always criticizing you negatively to the extent of causing your own self-esteem to deteriorate. Such behavior usually comes from someone who resents you from within.
- They try to control you
A family member who doesn’t like you will often try to control you. Often a toxic family member who holds resentment for you in their heart will not want to see you happy.
They will try and hold you back from any opportunities that will be good for you or will set you free of them. They will really hate it when you make any life decisions without including them.
Even if such a family member acts as they care deeply for you, it is completely unacceptable behavior since they are not really doing what is in your best interest.
- You have a gut feeling they do not like you
Usually, when someone does not like you, you have an inkling that they do not. This may be because things are awkward between you both, because you have picked up on their body language, or because you have noticed their behavior.
Either way, if your sixth sense tells you that a family member does not really like you and is insincere towards you, there is a big chance that the feeling is right.
Usually, our gut feeling picks up on the different signs and realizes these things before our brain does, which is why we should trust this feeling.
What you can do when a family member doesn’t like you?
If a family member does not like you, here are some ways of dealing with it:
Reach out to others for support
It can be difficult to deal with a family member who does not like you. In these situations, it is important to find someone who you can talk to and who would support you without asking any questions.
You may look for support and counsel to deal with it in the form of therapy. If that is not an option for you, you should reach out to your friends.
You should open up to them about what you are dealing with, accept their support, let them help you, and value their perspective on it. Having a solid support system can make dealing with stressful and difficult family situations easier.
This is especially helpful if you are dealing with a family member who does not make it apparent that they do not like you and only show it subtly. You can confront them about their behavior and see where it goes.
Ask them what the issue is and understand what the problem is. Let them know how they are making you feel. Try and find a solution that works for both of you. If the issue is actually justified, try and make amends.
If they do not have a genuine reason for acting this way, call them out on it and let them know that you will no longer put up with their behavior.
Boundaries are absolutely essential in relationships and even more so when it comes to family. The Absence of boundaries is often the root cause of many issues. To improve the situation you are in with a family member, you can start by establishing healthy boundaries.
Let them know that you are a person of your own, capable of making your own decisions and they need to accept you as you are.
If nothing else works, the best solution is to distance yourself from the family member. This is the last resort, when the family member in question is becoming toxic towards you and when you are stuck in a destructive cycle with them.
Keeping your distance is what is best for you and your mental health and also that family member. In the long run, the two of you will be better off apart.
Even though identifying and accepting that you have a family member who you do not like is just the first step, it is extremely important before you can start dealing with the problem at hand.
A person always exhibits signs when they do not like you and it is essential to pick up on them.