“It is human to make errors. It is terribly real that we will choose the wrong thing at times in our life. But it is in mistakes where we find our path. And what a beautiful, bumpy and crooked path it is. Never perfect, but always in the right direction.” -Mark Groves
Making mistakes is not something we like the sound of. However, as repugnant as it sounds, we all make mistakes. Mistakes are inevitable when it comes to life. You and I, we all make them through every step of life. It’s definitely not my favorite thing ever, but since it is a basic of human actions, we might as well try to come at ease with them at least.
Even though making mistakes is extremely customary, you should not take them lightly as they can turn the tables on you if you choose to ignore them and not learn any lessons from them. Everyone makes mistakes, but no mistakes are good mistakes unless you accept them and their acceptance can help concoct you into the best version of yourself.
Yes, mistakes are mortifying and disrupt the perfect cycle of your life, but the mistakes we make teach us more in life than any school ever could. This is because mistakes root from experiences and this can only happen if you live practically live life on your own.
Mistakes can be categorized into two: mistakes that brush a good person out of you, and the mistakes which push you further deeper into the pits of shallowness.
A mistake can only be characterized as a good mistake if we can get wind of it, embrace it, and as a result, learn from it. They are the ones that turn into true blessings for us.
However, a bad mistake is one that you overlook and slide aside. They might seem meaningless at the instance but pop up later to affect you.
We dive into a pool of mistakes daily and we aren’t even aware of them. But the underlying fact is that those mistakes ruin our life, without us even noticing. Been there and done that, haven’t we?
Being content with who you are as a person, applauding your flaws and embracing your personality and generating a sense of satisfaction with what you have is the only real gateway to happiness. However, we are not able to attain this satisfaction because we are miles apart from gratitude in today’s world.
So what are the most common mistakes that people make to ruin their life? Do you ever notice that you are doing it all and ruining your life?
Maybe you are and maybe you are not. And even if you are, I need you to know that your mistakes do not define you, and all you need to feel better is a clear mindset and a willingness for acceptance.
So let’s go run through this list and check out the mistakes you have made.
Trusting the wrong people:
The beginning of humanity has shown us how trust is the all-powerful force that lubricates the wheel of life. However, as pivotal, as it is, we humans have still not mastered the science behind the trust. It greases friendships, relationships, partnerships, basically everything. This means that there’s a greater chance of making mistakes when it comes to trusting people.
I have trusted the wrong people as well. Way too many times. But a piece of advice I can give you is to slow things down when you meet someone. Give yourself time to know each other, understand what’s best for you, and just let yourself go with the flow. Over time if you really feel that the person helps to bring the best out in you and has made you comfortable, then go ahead and put your trust in them instead of meeting someone and sharing your life stories all in the same second.
Lying to Oneself:
Believe it or not, we all lie. And a lot of times to ourselves. The truth is that the world is a harsh place and we all fantasize about what we’d want it to be like to escape the daily drudgeries and brutal reality of it.
Some people are forced to do this by certain life events that have shaped their lives massively and pushed them into a pith of unacceptance.
However, lying to yourself (or others) does no good but set up a fantastical and theatrical facade of a life that is just an illusion of real-life struggles, seen through rose-tinted shades.
This might seem like the right thing to do in the heat of the moment, but you’ll regret it when you are 60 and all you’ve got is a recollection of memories of your past.
Neglecting Old Friends because you found a Partner:
Our generation is a tainted one. When you get into a relationship, a lot of partners throw unnecessary and plain stupid restrictions down on you like a bomb.
Should we classify it as cupidity? Or stupidity? I know my answer. Choose yours.
Young love comes and goes fast like the seasons. You neglect your life-long friends for a partner whom you don’t even know will be there tomorrow, and if they leave, you are mingled in a state of loneliness and pure dismay. With no one there for you. You feel your whole life and the decisions you made move in your mind. You don’t like the sound of that, do you?
If you’re with someone and they really love you, they will never enforce themselves upon you like that if they know about the people who make you happy and cherish life.
I just have one word for both the parties (who demand it and who do it); think before you demand and think before you oblige. If they love you, they will trust you.
Being possessive and cutting you off from people who are important to you are two totally different things and you need to learn the difference between these two.
However, if they do so, then time to move on my friend.
Giving up on your Passion:
As much as we hate it, we are all aware of the invisible book of norms that our society has published for us. I’ve personally seen people annihilate what they love and are passionate about just for the sake of a society that is going to make an avalanche with the smallest of matters.
You are given one life and sacrificing it for someone else is proof of your low self-esteem and lack of confidence. Without a doubt doing what you love means you’re going to succeed at it. HAPPENS. I do not make the rules here. Education and studying is obviously the most seminal thing, but studying what you love makes it even better!
All in all, take my advice and do what makes you genuinely happy. Something that you enjoy. You like to paint, do it. You’re a math geek, get that degree.
Not moving on:
People leave us sometimes. Breakups happen. Loved ones die. I can’t say you should not grieve, but you need to leave the past in the past. You cannot die with the dead. And breakups teach you that your partner wasn’t worth it. You wouldn’t like to get reminded of that if you stay with that person and let them play with your life.
The major reason why people cannot move on is because of fear. The fear of change.
The thing about fear is that it compels you to think that you should not experience new things because what you’ve already experienced has broken you.
But the reality is that if you keep clinging onto your past like a parasite, then it will leave you too full to cherish your present. What you need is to take your new life in breath by breath and start afresh.
Holding onto pain is self-abuse.
And life is too short to waste it doing that.
Caring too much about what people thin
When it comes to life, it is healthy to care about things you love and care about. And the reality is that if you are unable to find anything to care about in your life, then life is simply inane. The true meaning of life can only be found if you have a purpose behind your life. However, sometimes caring too much can be toxic. Caring too much snatches your focus from the bigger and better things in life and dislocate your pretension of life.
I won’t say that you should just stop caring. What I mean is that you should step back every now and then to take a breath and shift your focus.
Just don’t overburden and stress your mind and soul and stop once a while to take the wind of it.
Thinking everyone is in a better position than you:
“Everyone wants happiness. No one wants pain. But you cannot have a rainbow without a little rain.” -Anonymus
Too often, you log in to Instagram and Facebook and scroll through your feeds full of your friends happy and partying. You do it again. And again. And again till you start feeling miserable with the life your living inside your bedroom.
Stop doing it. You are doing wrong to yourself.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that everybody is happier than you because no human being can be happy every second of their lives.
Everybody has a different path and a different journey.
You never know what they had to go through to enjoy that one vacation in their life.
Don’t let those happy pictures ruin your day and give you a negative mindset.
Don’t let some pictures fool you and hold you back from taking the next step.
Stop comparing yourself with your friends and with the ones you feel are superior.
Nobody lives a 24-hour-happy version of the life.
Giving up way too easily
We all come at points in our life when carrying on and going forward seems way too complicated and it’s easy to talk yourself into backing off. Even though giving up seems like the best option at the moment, it undoubtedly leaves you in a state where you’re vulnerable to miss out on a ton of things, including success.
All you need for success is some more time and the determination to hang on and you might be rewarded with what you wanted the whole time. It is untrue that if something is not happening, it will never happen.
Reruns and trials are the way to success. Each trial, each run, gives you a different experience and you learn more and more things.
Hence, not getting it in the first try does not reflect that you should entirely quit.
Instant success is a myth. No one wakes up to fame in one night. It often seems like some people have it too easy, but the truth is that victory comes after years of hard work, steadfastness, and determination.
It may seem tedious at first, but once you get where you want to be, the outstretched, truculent journey seems only seconds long and the whole road becomes meaningless.
As they say:
“There is no failure except in no longer trying.” -Elbert Hubbard
Taking love for granted:
Love needs no description. It is the feeling of all feelings.
When someone is in love with you, they dedicate their lives to your happiness, well-being, and gaiety. Love just makes people do that. If someone is there to love you and care for you, then count your blessings because not everyone is lucky enough.
However, if you do the exact opposite of what I just said, that is, take their love for granted, then you are just ungracious, inappreciative, and simply rude.
It’s all your loss, by the way.
When someone loves you, they expect the same in return. The same appreciation. The same care. The same validation.
And what happens if you are unable to give that to them?
They leave you.
You would not like that, would you?
No one wants to make efforts for someone who isn’t willing to make efforts for them.
So, accept love, and in turn, spread love because even the strongest feelings expire when ignored and taken for granted.
Whether it is fretting about things that are yet to happen, dwelling on things that have already happened, or holding onto blunders you’ve made, overthinking is something we do regularly.
And it sure is oppressive.
Overthinking is not only stressful, but can have various long-term effects, including the emergence of mental disorders like anxiety, depression, and various eating disorders.
We’ve all had points in our life when we’ve asked ourselves, “What if….?” Or scratched onto the heavy feeling of guilt that follows making a mistake.
This just generates indecisiveness and restrains you from moving onto the better things in life.
Dean Smith wasn’t wrong when he said:
“If you treat everything as a life or death matter, you’ll die a lot of times.”
The day you stop learning is the day you stop growing.
Life is way too short, and every moment is full of lessons to learn and bombards you with several experiences. There is no way that you stop learning from life somewhere along the line.
The only way to live this transient life to the fullest is to constantly keep exploring and searching for things to learn and improve from. Learning can be tough and boring sometimes, but it expands mindsets and help us to set bigger and better goals that lead to happiness and success. Nothing is better than attempting a difficult task and succeeding at it.
The more experiences you have, the more adaptive and more knowledgeable you become.
Lessons learned, especially from your mistakes, help to keep you grounded and humble because it normalizes that it is human to make mistakes, but the real deal is to accept them and learn from.
It is the key to self-growth.
It is important to understand that no one has the best shot at life. No one is always happy.
Anyone can get a job and earn money. But everyone cannot earn happiness.
Not everyone is born in a wealthy family, gets the best education, has a great IQ level.
But you know what?
The best life tip is to learn to be more grateful for what you have and to master the art of turning nothing into everything.
To make mistakes is to grow.
Acceptance is the key to happiness.
I know it’s hard, but I promise you will get over it.
Make sure to make yourself the captain of your ship and make the best out of everything today, to secure your future in all respects.
Always spend more time with the people who make you feel complete, see the potential in you, bring out the best in you, and manage to put a smile on your face you up every time you feel like giving up.
A lot of you might be thinking; I am done with my life, I have totally ruined it!
No, you have not!
If you are making these tiny little mistakes in your life, it is never too late to put a halt to it.
Stop lying to yourself to escape situations.
Man up and solve them for yourself.
Don’t give up on what you love because society might put labels on you.
They will call you weird even when you quit what you love.
Change and learn to grow with life. Don’t just stop at one end; chase the other end as well. Life is so much more than clinging on to the little mistakes. Embrace it with love and you will get the best outcome for sure!
“The greatest mistake a man can ever make is to be afraid of making one.” -Elbert Hubbard.